Wednesday, August 30, 2017

The Rageys 2014 The Rage Quitter Year End wrap up

The Rageys 2014 The Rage Quitter Year End wrap up


Im about 97% sure the majority of the hits I still get on this site come from bots, image searches, and people who have accidentally clicked my facebook posts. But in case you actually meant to come here (you liars), its that time of year again. So without further ado, please enjoy.....

The 2014 Rageys:
Completely unsponsored, because apparently brand loyalty means nothing to So-co.
WHY WONT YOU LOVE ME?


10: The "Google Fiber refusing to expand" award for "Game I wish I got to play" goes to....

Yakuza Ishin & Yakuza Zero (PS4)

This was going to be a lot angrier because for another year, not only did I not get a localization of Yakuza 5 but I also didnt get to play Yakuza Ishin and more than likely not the upcoming series prequel Yakuza Zero. I was ready to spit some serious venom.. But something magical happened. At the PlayStation Experience, Sony and Sega finally heeded from Gio Corsis #BuildingTheList campaign from months ago to bring certain games west. I will finally get to play a localized Yakuza 5 sometime next year.

Yakuza 4 was the first game I reviewed on this blog, and it holds to be one of the best games Ive ever purchased for my PS3. They put both Yakuza 4 and Yakuza Dead Souls on PSN for download. This series is getting a second chance, and for all the begging we did, it give me hope yet that we just might see these to come as well. I cant tell you enough that for 20 bucks, Yakuza 4 is one of the hands down best values in video gaming. Please download it, you have no idea what you are missing, and then purchase Yakuza 5. 


9: The "Heated Debate in a Confined Space with Ray Rice" garbage award for "Biggest Disappointment" goes to.....

The Evil Within

I didnt know "going back to my horror roots" meant "put out the same game Ive been putting out for 10 years". I fell for it hook, line, and sinker Shinji Mikami and I hope you are proud of yourself. I had a shiny new system and a ravenous need for more horror games. Trailers were promising, game play looked fun, atmosphere seemed right. Wasted no time getting my pre-order of that one ready to go. 

Unfortunately for me, I was met with an incomprehensibly poor story, graphics that seemed last gen, and a difficulty curve that faintly resembled a brick wall. I managed to see it through to the end, but when people asked me if it was fun? "Yes" was never the straight answer, there always had to be some validation to explain it. The game was functional but it wasnt challenging, it was cheap. The game got me to scream but not from horror, from anger and frustration. Worst of all, despite being new it felt like Ive played it before. For all the excitement I had for the game, The Evil Within grossly fell short of my expectations. 


8. The "Jacob actually died in Vietnam already" award for "Biggest Surprise" goes to.....

Bravely Default (3DS)

Anyone who knows me knows that Final Fantasy is basically the corner stone that laid the foundation of my entire gaming career. I made a very hardened effort to collect each one as they came out to have a full collection of them. Obviously over time, that became impossible because so many would keep coming out, and gradually started getting worse after a while. It was hard to keep up with, because after FF6 and FFX, I felt it was hard to match that level of perfection.

Some people at SquareEnix remember though, as shown in the surprise success Bravely Default. While not a Final Fantasy in title, this game follows its successful predecessors step for step and provided an absolutely wonderful JRPG experience with some new features, good story, and wonderfully traditional JRPG combat. Aside from a little grind tedium, Bravely Default was nearly perfect in every aspect, and it motivated me to buy my first Nintendo console in 8 years just so I could play it.


7. The "I seriously couldnt give less of a shit about the British Royal Family, or that Lebron put his arm around the Princess. They are just people,  get the fuck out of the news" award for "Most Overhyped game" this year goes to.....

Watch Dogs

Man oh man oh man, did Ubisoft ever drop the ball on this one. Yeah, pushing the game back to not get crushed by the monster that was Grand Theft Auto V was probably smart, but youd figure in the extra time you took, you could have made the game better.. Or you know, even good.

Watch Dogs is an example of taking a really good idea, and then doing absolutely nothing with it. They came out of their first E3 with a 10 minute unedited game play video showing all the cool ways hack the environment. Over time it regressed to a sandbox style shooter that had hacking elements. Eventually falling short by not looking great, having incredibly poor controls, and tired story that is basically just a game about Batman, without having Batman in it.

It was at the very least a playable experience so it escapes being my worst of the year, but the sheer amount of excitement and hype this game generated before its release, followed by a much shallower experience than advertised gives this my Overhyped award. No question.


6. The "Robert Griffin the 3rd" award for "Flash in the Pan" game of the year.

Outlast

You can argue that other games in this genre came first, but Outlast was a really solid entry in the first person, defenseless survival breed of games you are seeing today. While I wouldnt say the game is as scary as it could have been, its built on some solid mechanics has some very genuinely fucked up moments of gore that made me cringe. Specifically getting your fingers scissored off while a deranged, deformed, and naked Doctor waxes intellectual while he does it.

But more so than that, the game actually weaves a better sub-narrative than the actual story provides. Sure, things are kind messed up and it has a very indie movie feel about how it ends, but finding the notes around the asylum, or reading the main characters notebook end up painting a much more interesting story than Im actually being told. Its not often a game actually makes want to do its stupid collectible missions, but for the added story elements its absolutely welcome here.


5. The "West Florissant Ave. Fire Sale" award for "Worst Value" goes to....

Infamous: Second Son (PS4)

Dont get me wrong on this one: Infamous: Second Son was an absolutely fantastic game. Of course it is, Infamous games almost always are. Fun superhero sandbox where you fly around and trash fools with cool powers. Oh, and the voice of Troy Baker *Swoon*.

However, fun as it is, the fact that I can rip through the story and collect nearly everything in less than 4-6 hours? That is a pretty disappointing game length. Sure, for the work a day nine to fiver that might be all we have time for, but I prefer a long, meaty experience in my game that doesnt involve me playing it twice to see all the content (IE: the slightly different tone that Delsin speaks with if you are good or bad). Awesome game, but seems short for 60 bucks. Sorry Second Son, great game but you get worst value.


4. The "Dr. Topper 100% Happy Guarantee" award for "Best Value" goes to....

P.T - Playable Teaser (PS4)

This really had to be in the running for my biggest surprise, but when looking at it in concept it might have been one of the best values I had all year. As we all know by now, the mysteriously placed "Playable Teaser" ended up being a trailer for the new Silent Hills game. A game that only had one level, one hallway, basically one button. But what should have been a spooky romp for a few hours ended up setting the Internet on fire.

This single hallway showed me again that some people do still know how to make horror right and its just indie devs, but major players too. Sure, it didnt feel like a Silent Hill game, but it contained a very interesting narrative, had bone chillingly exceptional use of light and sound for fear, a legitimately terrifying antagonist, and a puzzle so difficult it took the collective Internet WEEKS to find the solution (if they even have yet). This short demo ended up being maybe the scariest game Ive played since Fatal Frame 2 and that says a lot. Kojima and Del Toro maybe be taking the Silent Hill franchise a different way, but they have me genuinely excited for it and that is something Silent Hill hasnt done for me as a franchise in a long long time.

Ive played this "teaser" for longer than Ive played some retail games, which hands down makes this game the Best Value winner. 


3. The "50 bucks found on the Ground" Honorable mention goes to....

Bayonetta 2 (Wii U)

What do you know, Nintendo? Looks like you can still put out a video game that is awesome without it being so far up Marios fucking ass it can pick the back of his teeth. Which ultimately is what I wanted out of you. Sure, the game came out on the actual systems first, but when they snubbed it, you picked up the pieces and allowed it to really become something special. 

Bayonetta 2 is the only Wii or WiiU game I own. It was the only one I felt I needed to have. It smashed all of my expectations, and masterfully fixed any complaints I had with the first one. Only a slight bit easier, but ultimately another insanely fun over the top spectacle fighter with a much more coherent story line. The game gave me VERY serious considerations for game of the year, and the only reason its not is because once I put it down I hadnt gone to pick it back up. But if I owned a Wii U and still had ready access I would be. Mark my words {again}, Bayonetta 2 is the best thing to happen to Nintendo, and is an incredibly close runner up to my game of the year. 


2. The "#GamerGate Controversy" award for "Worst Game of the Year" goes to.....

PlayStation All-Stars Battle Royale (PS3)


2014 was actually a pretty good year for games. When its a good year for games I dont really get to rage all that much, and all the releases I played this year pretty much left me with fairly minimal complaints. Sure there were disappointments, but no real bad games. So to find a bad game, I had to go to one of the freebies I downloaded.

I always kind of smirked at the concept of "Super Sony Brothers Brawl" when I heard about it, but it wasnt till I actually played it to realize how bad it was. Slow clunky control and movement, incredibly poor visual design, uninspired story modes, generally bad play style. It was rough to just sit through the game twice.

But even worse, is when I tried to play it with a friend for my Extra Life marathon. We did so as a gag, but hes a hardcore Super Smash player. Inside of 2 games, he turned to me and said "this is the worst game Ive ever played." I am hard pressed to disagree with him. It may not have come out this year, but it certainly earns my worst of the year honors. 


1. The "El Palenque Steak Super Burro" Award for "Best game of the year" goes to...

Dark Souls II (PS3/360)

Nobody should really be surprised by this but I have to tell you, I really agonized over the decision. I had it locked as my number 1 until I played Bayonetta 2. To be completely honest, if I went from a stand of fun factor, Bayonetta 2 might have taken game of the year. But what it ended up coming down to is what games I played longer, and still look to play. From that stance, there is no question.

The debate rages on if Dark Souls 2 was as good as the first game. It certainly didnt seem as polished as it could be, and I think some of the levels were designed to just be cheap and frustrating rather than cleverly difficult. But even considering that, I have like 4 character types built all tallying 60-100 hours a piece, and I still have yet to make it all the way through new game+. It might be a little bit of a bias pick to be sure, but I find it hard for anyone who actually commits to playing a souls game to not absolutely love it.

With a PS4 edition on the horizon with all the included DLC, and the upcoming Bloodborne before that, looks like From Software is set to just slay the games market for another year. But for this one? Dark Souls 2 takes my game of the year.



So its usually around here where I thank the small collection of you that join me in my little corner of the web, but this blog hit a bit of milestone as this very post you are reading makes my 100th post for Rage Quitter, and nearly 70,000 views since its advent. So to do something a little special for it, I would like to present you with something a little spoilery. Please enjoy my Top 10 moments in games since I started writing this blog. Enjoy and See you Next Year!


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Tuesday, August 29, 2017

The Rageys 2013 The Rage Quitter Year End wrap up

The Rageys 2013 The Rage Quitter Year End wrap up


God what are you people still doing here? This whole gamer blog fad was so last year, nobody reads this crap anymore.  Well, Since youre here, might as well pull up a chair. Because another year of video games have gone by and Ive played a lot of them, so I might as welcome you to this years year end wrap up of my best and worst games of the year.

The 2013 Rageys:
Seriously So-Co, Who do I have to blow in that corporation to get you to Sponsor me?


10: The Picked last behind the Fat kid with one Leg in kickball award for "Game I wish I got to play" goes to....

Yakuza 5 (PS3)

Over the past year, I developed a burning fury for the people over at Sega. After three entertaining romps in the Yakuza franchise I have been eagerly anticipating the new installment. A year goes by, and Sega only responds to a western release with "no comment". They made a haiku in response to the inquiry about an announcement coming up. An announcement that says "hey we are making a new one, and you arent getting that either! LOL." FUCK YOU SEGA.

Sega is sitting a on goldmine of slightly obscure but highly desired titles by people in the west, and they refuse to localize them because they dont think Americans "get it" and Yakuza 5 is the chief offender. The Sony Third Party Production division knows its one of the top two requests for western release. So yeah, just skip on the piles of money you could be making by releasing your actual good games. Keep putting out Sonic: Losing a Step so nobody will buy that either.   Fucking morons.....

And If you guys fuck up Atlus or me getting Persona 5? I will personally fly to your Japan HQ to suicide bomb the Sega CEOs office. (Facetious Satire, NSA)


9: The Trent Richardson 2.8 Yards Per Carry garbage award for "Biggest Disappointment" goes to.....

Assassins Creed  3 (PS3)

I played this during the holiday launch window so I am counting it for the beginning of this year.  At the time of purchase, I was getting very frustrated the story wasnt going anywhere and I was getting sick of paying for new versions of the same game. So to cap off the actual 5th game of the franchise, I was treated to the worst protagonist in the series, most boring story, and the most slapdashed rushed climax to the Desmond narrative I have ever seen. Aside from the ship combat, there is virtually nothing good about this installment of the game. To be completely honest, this was a SERIOUS contender for my worst game of the year. However, as my pending review for Black Flag will tell you, there is still some hope for this series.


8. The Nilbog is Goblin spelled backwards award for "Biggest Surprise" goes to.....

Payday 2 (Xbox Live, PSN, Steam)

Originally, I was gonna go with Battleblock Theater for this one, but I got bored of that and it got surpassed in the last moments of 2013.  Payday 2 could possibly be my favorite FPS ever, and I usually hate FPS. Grand Theft Auto V taught me that pulling heists are pretty awesome.

And Payday 2 is just that: You are given a job with up to 3 other players, you case your location be it bank, jewel store, night club, or whatever. Figure out where the guards are, where the cameras are, where the staff walks. Sometimes you can be in and out of a place, clearing out a safe before the staff even knows you are there.

But MOST of the time, it turns into a game of survival mode as someone inevitably calls the cops. Typically it turns into a firefight as you wait for your drill to crack into a safe. While the maps are usually the same they sometimes spawn things in various areas or ramp up the detection. But what I love about it is that is constantly chaotic and stressful, and you feel like a complete badass when the heist starts to go your way in a hairy moment. Payday 2 fuckin rules.


7. The Oh my god, I didnt fuckin care when the dumb British royal twats got married, and I dont care that they had a stupid kid either award for "Most Overhyped game" this year goes to.....

BioShock: Infinite (XB360)

You just cant throw out a phrase like "as close to perfection as a game can get" and not expect me to be critical of it. Dont get me wrong, I love these characters and the storytelling was peerless. But my problem with BioShock: Infinite is that it was a dumbed down version of a shooter I actually kind of liked.

Gone were the myriad of fun weapons for 2 generic weapon slots, gone were the terrifyingly insane Splicers for generic troopers in 1800s coats. Gone was the creepy and dark settings of Rapture, for the bright and sunny streets of whereeversville, Gone were the Big Daddies and Little Sisters.

There were some good bits to Infinite and it was clearly better than Bioshock 2. But frankly, its even more watered down to the first Bioshock as Bioshock was to SystemShock 2. Great story, but game perfection? Hardly.


6. The Charles Ramsey 15 Minutes of Fame award for "Flash in the Pan" game of the year.


Tomb Raider (PS3)

While Squenix didnt think this title to be a success in the market, I really had some fun with it. Sure, it took the Tomb Raider original formula, made Lara Croft less of raging psychopath at the start (but barely), and put in a ridiculous sprinkling of Uncharted an produced one of my favorite examples of how the 3rd person shooter genre is done correctly.

I wasnt a fan of the Tomb Raider series, and I havent been since the start. But I really did enjoy this game a lot. One of the few games where I actually looked forward stealthing around a picking off targets with a bow and arrow. Its story got a bit ridiculous at times and clearly wasnt the best written game. But it was fun and solid purchase. It basically met me half way to bring me into a series I didnt care for. Good show Tomb Raider.

I still hate Lara Croft though.


5. The 750 Dollar Photo of an Xbox one Ebay Purchase award for "Worst Value" goes to....

Beyond: Two Souls (PS3)

You know Quantic Dream, maybe you should sell yourself as an animation studio, and less of a game studio. You sort of had me interested in this game medium you were selling in Heavy Rain but you completely dropped the ball here by not learning from your mistakes. The Graphics in this are amazing, Page and Dafoe show that they are consummate actors and deserve proper billing.

But I play games to PLAY FUCKING GAMES. So watching Ellen Page be sad for 10 hours while occasionally knocking over some papers is hardly engaging game play. Every game dev should sit with their product and then ask themselves "Am I having fun?". A great story is one thing, but there is a good reason movies are 2 hours, not 10. If you are gonna stretch it out that long, you have to have engaging middle bits. Not worth 60 bucks. Should have done Last of Us, Ellen.


4. The "Just the Tip" award for "Best Value" goes to....

Dragons Crown


Proof that simple still works. This game doesnt have CGI out the asshole. This game doesnt bring a load of complex mechanics to the table. Just straight up side scrolling brawly fun with fantastic art direction, fast paced combat, ratcheting difficulty, and loot gathering.

I was really excited for this game and it absolutely delivered on all fronts. The only real complaint is that it somewhat lacks a narrative, but thats really not what you are getting a game like this for. Its shows hands down that all the shiny AAA budgets and graphics doesnt exactly make a game great. But awesome game play always does.


3. The Consistently On Time Chinese Food Delivery guy Honorable mention goes to....

Tales of Xillia (PS3)


There were a lot of options to go for with the honorable mention, because there were a lot of really good games this past year. Saints Row IV was a front runner here because it was just ridiculous.  Atelier Ayesha just because of the number of hours I dumped into it. Disgaea D2 for bringing back a group of characters I loved. Hitman: Absloution for polishing up the last true stealth game Ive had in years.

But I have to give it to Tales of Xillia because the Tales of franchise is just always a beacon of excellence in the active battle JRPG genre. Great characters, good storyline, fun combat, and typically pretty good voice acting. Yeah its probably a pretty generic pick, but if you play any Tales game you can clearly see what I am talking about. Heres to the Symphonia HD Collection next year. 


2. The Ariel Castro Stay at home Dinner Date award for "Worst Game of the Year" goes to.....

Mugen Souls (PS3)

Dead Space 3s Co-op and micropayments made a strong case for worst of the year. Walking Dead: Survival Instincts generic and bad game play really did too. But I had Mugen Souls locked in as my worst of the year back in May, and Im happy to say that it hasnt budged.

Creepily oversexualized young characters, terrible soundtrack, choppy and broken animations, excessive text exposition, overly complicated battle system, overly complicated menu system, generic character creation, incredibly weak story, disgustingly cutesy j-pop sequences, constant ongoing fight animations, and the list goes on. Its absolutely remarkable just how badly this game managed to fuck up at almost every given area. I bought the game at discounted price, and I even regret that.

But whats worst of all is it had one decent idea for the character interaction animations that actually could have been put into better NIS America games, and they didnt even do that. Mugen Souls was just flat out terrible and a complete waste of my time and money.


1. The Johnny Malloys 2 dollar Long Island Award for "Best game of the year" goes to...

The Last of Us (PS3) AND Grand Theft Auto V 

I really tossed back and forth here because both of these games were nothing short of incredible. And for a long time, it seemed like nothing could top The Last of Us. Sure, at times it felt like it was just a cut out of Uncharted but the added stealth elements with the dark atmosphere, the Cordyceps monsters, and a very well acted and likable cast made The Last of Us and absolutely fantastic experience and one of my must plays for the year. Ellen Page was pissing about how the Ellie character looked like her, and maybe shes right to be upset, because Last of Us was way better than her game.

But then Grand Theft Auto V came along. Its sales numbers alone tell the story, nearly smashing any single day record set before it. After taking a massive break in the development from previous game, GTA:V addressed nearly every complaint I had. Better combat, brighter colors, much less depressing story, more arcadey driving. But most of all, I fucking LOVED this cast of characters. I want Trevor Phillips as my life coach. But more so than that, the game was just a blast to play. I managed to rip through it twice in back to back playthroughs, and had a significant amount of fun playing the online mode.

While I cant consider either game perfect, these two come really, REALLY close. Since they were both so great and I felt I copped out last year with Silent Hill 2, they co-win my game of the year.


Maybe Ive lost a bit of steam overtime, and the hit count as been dropping. But if Im still playing games, Im still gonna have stuff to say about them. See you in 2014.




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Tuesday, August 8, 2017

The Rageys The Rage Quitter Year End Wrap Up

The Rageys The Rage Quitter Year End Wrap Up


So since I am an official blogger now so I guess I should do some kind of introspective year end post about everything I played. And since everyone and their brother seems to do some form of top ten list or awards listing, I guess I have to do one as well. Keep in mind, as Ive said before, I am not a paid professional so I can only cover what I have played. So if I turns out I didnt list something you felt deserved and award, then I hadnt played it, didnt want to, or wasnt going to. So feel free to fashion an award with a wooden spoon and tin foil so you can accept on behalf of Gears of War 3 or Call of Duty because they wont get one here. Anyway, get comfy, and without further adieu...

The 2011 Rageys: presented by Southern Comfort
Its not but seriously So-Co. Sponsor me.. Please..


10: The Angrily Masturbating outside of your Exs window while their sleeping with their new fling award for "Game I wish I got to play" goes to....

The 3rd Birthday (psp)


Probably one of the worst things in of my most nerdy moments, is having to listen to me jerk off the Parasite Eve franchise. A horror action RPG that was released in 1998 on the Playstation and then released as a full blown survival horror with RPG elements in its 2000 sequel, this universe has always had a special place in my heart. From the very start of the first game where an opera house audience bursts into flames, I was in love with this game. After vanishing for 10 years it finally makes a return, but on the PSP of all things. It got very poor reviews and by that point I had stopped buying PSP games. So instead I lustfully imagine how much fun it could be every time I pick up the box longingly at work. Like Im creepily stalking Aya Brea... Maybe someday.... someday...


9: The Adventure Express Garbage Coaster garbage award for "Biggest Disappointment" goes to.....

Dragon Age II (XB360/PS3)


I loved the crap out of the first Dragon Age and have played it through many times. It basically contained everything I liked about fantasy: long epic storyline, interesting and fun characters (except Alistair being a whiney douchebag), a reasonably simple combat interface, hilarious and serious dialogue, and a large degree of customization to character and story. So when I played the demo to see they borrowed some of the great aspects of Mass Effect II to give the character voice and make combat sharper and more involved, I expected DA2 to be superior in every way. More or less I felt that way about those two points but to make those improved they seem to do away with all the different maps, locations, and story. We almost get 3 mini stories that are rather slapdashly solved, leaving the game to just be one big tease to Dragon Age 3. I suppose its still fun, but it basically 5 maps stretched out to a massive intermission.

8. The Jigsaw was in the room the whole time award for "Biggest Surprise" goes to.....

Shadows of the Damned (xb360/ps3)


I had never heard of this game when it came out. It honestly didnt show up on my radar at all. Even looking at the box art I wasnt moved to play it. But when I went home that day and fired up my Xbox at least 3 or 4 friends were playing it. I flipped on my PS3 and 2 other friends were playing it as well. So out of curiosity sake I went back out and picked it up to try it. Needless to say it was basically all the fun I had with say Resident Evil 4 but what really grabbed my attention isnt so much the story as it was the sheer ridiculousness  of the banter and language used. The game is just a 8 to 10 hour dick joke. At first it came off as juvenile and annoying but the longer it went on the more silly and hilarious it became. Basically adding an interesting darkness mechanic, a stream of penis jokes, and a 3rd person shooter mechanic I have grown to love made this one of the best random finds for me this year.

7. The I dont gives a shit about two British Twats getting married award for "Most Over hyped game " this year goes to.....

Limbo (XBLA/PSN)


So I know I am going to catch heat for this one, but I cant think how many people came into their panties when they talked to me about how amazing this game was. One of the best things I can download on the marketplace. Almost every magazine gave it a stellar review and every critic ranted about how it was a must have. So finally getting around to play it I was stunned to find out this gem of a masterpiece was nothing more than a greyscale noir version of essentially a Mario game. Maybe platformers have passed me by but after a very impressive and cool looking first level featuring a chase from a massive spider silhouette, the game then dropped to a slow paced crawl for me leaving me with little motivation to keep playing. Dont get me wrong, Limbo is not by any stretch bad. I love the art style, the open ended interpretation of the story structure fits this game perfectly, and the puzzles are clever, but it just left me feeling emptier than I was expecting. That complied with a with a very abrupt ending, I felt that Limbo got a lot more hype than it deserves. I thought Braid was better.


6. The Ice Ice Cant Touch this award for "Amazing then Forgotten" game of the year.

Dead Space 2 (PS3/XB360)


So this listing was supposed to be my award for most underrated, but the 4 games I was going to mark as underrated were anything but after doing some research, so Id like to take a second to talk about Dead Space 2. I really would try to push the first of this series when customers were looking for something different and people would give me endless complaints or reasons why they wouldnt play it. The 2nd game came out and sold incredibly well, selling well over 2 millions copies, yet whenever I discuss this game with others, I never seem to find anyone who likes the game. Its just a game with solid mechanics. A tried and true 3rd person over the shoulder shooter with intense action. The game may not be scary like other horror games are but its nice to fight things that dont just require a headshot to take down. If there are any games that deserve a replay, its Dead Space 2.

5. The 18.50 For two Coors Light drink minimum at the Glitter Gulch strip club in Vegas (seriously, fuck that place.) award for "Worst Value" goes to....

Portal 2 (XB360/PS3)


Man... This one is gonna hurt to write. I am such a huge nerd for the Portal franchise. But I have to be realistic. The first in this series was a wonderful little surprise stuck in as a bonus to the Half life: Orange Box, so despite it being a tad short, its more than adequate for what you paid for it. Portal 2 was a stand alone release and it can be near impossible to duplicate perfection. Now, I love this game. Love it to death, but lets be honest here. Its a tad longer than the first one and they did introduce some new characters and interesting mechanics for puzzles, but with no deviations to repeat playthroughs or the multiplayer getting fast enough DLC content, its a game that really you only need one play unless youre an achievement whore, which I am not. Love this game to death, but 60 dollars? I cant help but feel cheated.

4. The Ill have just one more then Ill quit, I can stop any time I want to award for "Best Value" goes to....

Yakuza 4 (PS3)


So Ill try to restrain from beating this game off any harder than I already have in the past 6 months since this blogs creation, but any game that I can play once, lose my save, play it AGAIN, and then continue to play it in premium mode tallying well over 150 hours and still only achieving about 34% completion, I cant think of a better example of money well spent. I still have the urge to go back and try to complete all the sidequests and mini games. With a mind numbing variety of different activities on top of the entertaining combat, Yakuza 4 easily takes best value.

3.5 The Lingering Sour taste in your mouth after a hot night in the P.E. storeroom award for the "award the writer did without checking to make sure the game was actually released in 2011, but didnt want to delete his work" goes to...

Final Fantasy XIII (XB360/PS3)


Ok Squenix, I know you are probably sick of making this franchise, but the middle finger you threw your fans with this game was absolutely heartbreaking. I didnt expect perfection again after you released the masterpiece that was Final Fantasy VI. But then you eventually delivered after so long with Final Fantasy X. I know things will never be as good as those two (7 is overrated, get over it.), but seriously? I felt completely cheated after this one. You produced a 60 hour straight line for us to walk, with potentially the worst and most dislikable cast of characters in franchise history, a story line that makes no sense and was completely uninteresting, a combat system that took away more control than XIIs did, cut scenes that essentially repeated the same dialogue in every single one, and the cardinal sin of just slamming all the back story in boring text screens instead of weaving it into the game as I played. I played it through to the end was completely unsatisfied. Heres hoping XIII-2 in January functions as your apology, or you risk finally killing off this timeless franchise.

3. The Thankless Cog in the Machine honorable mention goes to....

Infamous 2 (PS3)


I dont really have very much to say about this game. They took a game that was very good and then improved upon it. They tried to change the look of the hero and the fans didnt like it, so they listened to what the fans wanted. They made sure to keep everything about the first Infamous that made the game fun and they brought in two other interesting characters and added some other elements for the hero to use. Its fun to go around the map and destroy things or just skyjump and hover around. And the story line (the hero one) was well done and actually gives a difficult moral choice at the end of it. Both versions of Infamous should be an absolute staple of any PS3 owners library. Just a very good game that doesnt seem to get the recognition it deserves.

2. The Surprise guest starring role in a Bukkake Video award for "Worst Game of the Year" goes to.....

Dead Island (XB360/PS3)



Proof that the addition of zombies to anything does not always make a game better. For a guy who doesnt play very many online games and especially one that didnt like ones like Borderlands, Dead Island was hands down my worst game purchase of this year. After playing single player for an hour or two, I became so bored that I wanted to stop playing and take it back. After a brief bit of fun with some friends and dropped further along, boredom sunk in immediately again as the game was now too hard to advance alone. Its too slow, too long, combat is buggy and not entertaining, the story is uninteresting, the character models look bug eyed, the soundtrack is depressing, I could go on. I was incredibly excited about this game but getting excited over a single promotional CGI animation can bite you on the ass. And It certainly did here. The more I look back on this game the more I regret getting it. Fuck Dead Island. Dead Island Sucks.

1. The Biagios Large Sausage and Pepperoni Pizza incredibly regionally specific reference Award for "Best game of the year" goes to...

Dark Souls (PS3/XB360)


If you didnt see this coming, you need to get your brain checked. Being a gamer back in the C64 era, I have grown up on games being merciless to me. This game brings up a pulse rate and an excitement while I play it ever single time that no other game does. The fact that I can play it through multiple times and never get bored with it, memorizing every inch of map and learning every item combination, and still get my ass kicked by common enemies or drop in to win and lose PVP without having to hear children screaming in ear as I play just adds to this release. Every single time I play a character and say "alright, next time I want to try it as THIS type of character" and repeat the process over and over again. The game is brutal but easily the most satisfying when you start to master this game. And every time I stop playing it for a few weeks and pick it back up, its brand friggen new again. Dark Souls is just flat out fun and awesome if you have the patience to hang in there.


Thank you all for reading for the past six months and making this fun for me to do. Hope your holiday was good and your new year doesnt suck like I expect mine to. See you in January.

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Saturday, August 5, 2017

The Rageys 2015 The Rage Quitter Year End Wrap Up

The Rageys 2015 The Rage Quitter Year End Wrap Up


This years Rageys will be a tad different because honestly this was a short year for games, and with the X+Y thing I didnt get as many written as I would have liked to. Still though, this year had its series of ups and downs and while all of them might not have gotten site reviews, I still played an awful lot of games. Hopefully Ill have a slew of games to review in January, but  until then, please enjoy.....

The 2015 Rageys
Maybe I can get Clover Valley to sponsor me, At least they have a 100% happy guarantee


10: The "Professional Esports Becoming a Thing 15 Years Too Late" award for "Game I wish I got to play" goes to....

Silent Hills (PS4)

After a long grieving period, I have come to accept that probably the game that would reinvent the horror genre probably isnt going to ever happen.... But that doesnt mean I dont want it to...  I dont know what the hell Konami is thinking by trying to burn everything they built to ash, but if there is any sign that the series that I love is truly dead for good, this would be that sign (well, that and the new Silent Hill game was a pachinko machine). 

Rest in piece Silent Hills. You had the potential to be something truly special, and now it seems we will never know.



9: The "Konami 2015 Business Strategy" garbage award for "Biggest Disappointment" goes to.....

Dead Rising 3 (PC)


During the big releases of the two major consoles, it became apparent that exclusive titles wear going to be a big selling point, and as you all could tell my lot stood with sony. But Microsoft did have one game I really wanted to play, and that was Capcoms zombie filled ho-down Dead Rising. When I saw that a 3rd installment of the game was going to be released on PC, I excitedly jumped at my chance to download it. And with my shiny wired 360 controller I finally got to sit down to play it.

And then after that first hour, I put it down and never picked it back up again. Maybe I dont give a shit about the new character, or how washed out brown and boring the color scheme is, or maybe the series didnt do enough new to keep my interest. But if I shill for a game I have very excited about and then put it down almost immediately and not go back to it? That wins biggest disappointment. 



8. The "Holly Holm Embarrassingly Knocking Out Rhonda Rousey" award for "Biggest Surprise" goes to.....

Child of Light (3DS)


On the other end of the spectrum, Child of Light was a game I thought was good in the demo, but not enough to buy the game immediately. Two years I waited because I didnt think I wanted to pay 15$ for it. So when I get it for like 3 bucks on steam and realize that I should have paid the 15 for it, that is an incredibly positive sign.

Aside from bad prose in limerick form, this game had an incredibly fun combat system, and absolutely beautiful soundtrack, fun characters, stylish art design, and a reasonably short play time to make this an incredibly worthwhile experience. I didnt think that I would have liked it as much as I did, and the soundtrack of this game is part of my regular work playlist. This game wins my biggest surprise.



7. The "Virtual Reality Movement in Games" award for "Most Overhyped game" this year goes to.....

Metal Gear Solid 5

So ok, probably not going to have the most credible opinion on this one. But because this is the 3rd point in this list where Im referencing the Konami debacle, I felt the game deserves mention. I liked Metal Gear Solid, Solid 2, and Solid 4. I never got around to 3, and at one point was looking forward to playing 5.

But with each article I read, each story about how Konami was being a dick to Kojima, each post about fans putting stickers with Kojimas name on copies of the game, each parody video about the situation, each restriction the Konami lawyers enforced, I became exhausted. After a while, my interest started to fade. Downloaded that prequel demo chapter thing, and bought the game used instead of new after the holiday. And both of them have just been sitting there.

Its probably the first time I ever have gotten so tired of hearing about a game I wanted to play, that I ended up not wanting to play it anymore. I have it now, but who knows when Im going to get to it. Hype has never killed my interest before, so I felt that merits my most Overhyped award. Sorry MGSV, Im sure youre great and Ill get to you sometime.



6. The "Smart-Watch Fad" award for "Flash in the Pan" game of the year.

Dragon Age: Inquisition

Always can appreciate when someone learns from their mistakes, and in the case of Dragon Age: Inquisition, they certainly learned theirs. Taking a step back and re-evaluating the cash grab they made with Dragon Age 2, they rebuilt and remolded DA: Inquisition from the ground up and produced a much more enjoyable experience because of it. Hearing people complain that they were boxed in a small number of maps, DA: Inquisition blows the up the world to an massive scale, with people literally playing the first section so long that it knocked the steam out of them to keep playing. That is a total 180 of philosophy.

While it didnt seem to really connect to the Dragon Age canon that was set before it (although it did bring back Morrigan *swoon*), it weaved a tale with some seriously difficult moral choices for me to make as it unfolded. With lots of different character building potential it gave me lots of ways to play the game, and this time produced a very interesting and fun set of characters which blow the last game out of the water.

I just wish the character creation wasnt ass. 



5. The "Full Price Early Access Alpha Build" award for "Worst Value" goes to....

Persona 4: Dancing All Night (Vita)


I hate putting a game I liked in a negative category, but I have to call a spade a spade here.  Persona 4: Dancing All Night is a fantastic game. It continues the Persona 4 canon which I love, lets me revisit some of my favorite characters, and despite having a goofy dancing theme to the game the story still somehow managed to be awesome, harrowing, and interesting. My love for Persona 4 is unshaken here, that much is obvious.

But when the game is only out for a month and has over 70 fucking dollars of DLC, that shit is completely unacceptable in my book. Even to something I love as much as Persona 4. Its just another case of a company withholding completed content to charge me a little more for it later.  Go to hell Atlus, I thought you would above this money grabbing bullshit. Ive never felt so betrayed. I want to play all the extra content, but you wont get an extra cent from me for that shit. Fuck you.



4. The "McDonalds Dollar Mozzarella Sticks" award for "Best Value" goes to....

Bloodborne (PS4)


Is anyone really surprised that Bloodborne is my game of the ye... wait.. Its not? How is that possible?! Yes, for the first time since Ive started doing this charade, the current "From Software" game is not my game of the year. Believe me, I wanted it to be.

Bloodborne shook up the regular "souls game" rigmarole by picking up the tempo of the fights and removing your ability to block. The game rewarded aggressive gameplay, and managed to continue to punish me for hesitation. The Gothic scene fit in quite nicely and had some excellent monster design. The only problem was the game was kind watered down with skills and equipment which only really allowed for like 2 or 3 build types.

But the recently released "Old Hunters" added a meaty chunk of locations, bosses, items, weapons and armor to an already lengthy experience. It provided more variables and different ways to build the character, and since Ive rolled through it with 3 different characters at like 70 hours a piece, That wins best value.... Actually, there is one other that is a better value but well get to that in a little. 



3. The "Boom: Butterfly Effect" Honorable mention goes to....

Until Dawn (PS4)


I love that the games landscape is awash with new horror IP, but this one had me worried. The more I saw gameplay and trailers, I was very worried that this would just be another Heavy Rain or Beyond: Two Souls. On one hand, it was. But on the other, it totally wasnt.

Yes it followed the cinematic story style of play Ive gotten bored with in the past. But in this one it forced you to make split second decisions often, and many of them had the potential to hurt or kill your characters. The cheesy horror movie story helped this, but rung to me as one of the first proper implementations of this gameplay style. This was fun, playing a sad Ellen Paige getting harassed at a party was not.

While Id say you wont get much replay value more than 2 plays by yourself, I will say this is a great game to have some friends over and let them make the decisions. Knowing whats gonna happen and seeing what choices your friends make made this an incredibly social game for me. Ended up being the one of the most multiplayer games Ive played in a while. Until Dawn was absolutely worth the purchase to me. 



2. The "EVO Grand Finals Controller Malfunction" award for "Worst Game of the Year" goes to.....

Resident Evil: Revelations 2 (PS4)


Capcom, I think it might be time to put this series to bed. It had a great run, but the magic just isnt there anymore. Even getting to finally play again as my favorite character in this series again, Claire, didnt motivate me enough to get through your episodic installment of this game.

Each installment of this story becomes more watered down and less interesting to me. There is no new mainstay baddie that feels like a credible threat to the growing cast of protagonists. Forcing me to control 2 characters who are pretty much useless didnt endear me to the system. Moira and whoever the fuck the little girl was could have been NPCs for as useful as they were. After 2 or 3 chapters I became disenchanted enough to not care how the story turned out, put it down, and never went back.

Im glad I waited for for this to come down in price, because even the discounted amount wasnt even worth it to me. While we are saying our final goodbyes to Silent Hill, we should move a plot over and say ours to Resident Evil as well. Even the idea of a remake of Resident Evil 2 doesnt have me excited anymore.



1. The "Woshige Premature Celebration" Award for "Best game of the year" goes to...


Smite (PC/Xbox One)


I wanted to give this best value so Bloodborne could be my game of the year, but I have to call this like it is. For a guy who has been pretty lukewarm to the MOBA genre as a whole, no game has held my attention this year longer than Smite has. 

Some games I play like 3 times through, some games I have a 400+ hour save. Smite has somehow gotten me to play a strictly online multiplayer game, going against all convictions I have, nearly every night for at least two or three hours since I installed it. Its caused me to host my first all day lan party (of which only 2 other people attended but it was good enough for me). And despite not being good at the game, not knowing the difference between an ADC or a Mid Support pusher, and multiple nights of rage fueled profanity, I somehow keep coming back for more. 

Switching from overhead map view to 3rd person makes Smite feel much faster paced and more skillful, the gods from actual religious pantheons scratch my love of mythology nicely, and although it was free play I had no problem plunking down the 30 bucks for all of the characters to be unlocked. I might put down the other games after a while, but I see no signs of me putting down Smite any time soon. Rage Quitter Game of the Year, hands down. 



Cant believe Im still writing on this thing considering how little traction it gets. Heres to the next year of it.

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